A Teacher's Résumé - Unisex Organic Cotton T-shirt
Jaded teacher's résumé with wormy apple graphic on back. Spooky apple repeated on left chest.
FULL TEXT ON BACK:
OBJECTIVE
To inspire young minds to pretend to love learning
PROFESSIONAL ACHIEVEMENTS
Explained the same simple concept in 17 different ways (while sneaking only 3 huffs of my dry erase markers)
Counseled students through personal traumas (like “he’s wearing the same hoodie as me”)
Survived every parent/teacher conference (no helicopter, snowplow, or privileged parent left behind)
CAREER SKILLS
Psychically apprehending the “bathroom-break” fugitives
Clairvoyantly decoding every dark, subterranean meaning behind the expression “I don’t get it”
Preternaturally differentiating an AI essay from a paper written by an underdeveloped human aspiring to be a robot
AWARDS
Resting Teacher Face Hall of Fame
The Wise-apple Award for Impeccably Veiled Sarcasm
Most Likely to Host a TED Talk on “The 6000 Stages of Career Anxiety”
Made from 100% organic ring-spun cotton, this unisex t-shirt is a total must-have. It's high-quality, super comfy, and best of all—eco-friendly. US customers should order a size up.
• 100% organic ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 5.3 oz./yd.² (180 g/m²)
• Single jersey
• Medium fit
• Set-in sleeves
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Wide double-needle topstitch on the sleeves and bottom hems
• Self-fabric neck tape (inside, back of the neck)
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Jaded teacher's résumé with wormy apple graphic on back. Spooky apple repeated on left chest.
FULL TEXT ON BACK:
OBJECTIVE
To inspire young minds to pretend to love learning
PROFESSIONAL ACHIEVEMENTS
Explained the same simple concept in 17 different ways (while sneaking only 3 huffs of my dry erase markers)
Counseled students through personal traumas (like “he’s wearing the same hoodie as me”)
Survived every parent/teacher conference (no helicopter, snowplow, or privileged parent left behind)
CAREER SKILLS
Psychically apprehending the “bathroom-break” fugitives
Clairvoyantly decoding every dark, subterranean meaning behind the expression “I don’t get it”
Preternaturally differentiating an AI essay from a paper written by an underdeveloped human aspiring to be a robot
AWARDS
Resting Teacher Face Hall of Fame
The Wise-apple Award for Impeccably Veiled Sarcasm
Most Likely to Host a TED Talk on “The 6000 Stages of Career Anxiety”
Made from 100% organic ring-spun cotton, this unisex t-shirt is a total must-have. It's high-quality, super comfy, and best of all—eco-friendly. US customers should order a size up.
• 100% organic ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 5.3 oz./yd.² (180 g/m²)
• Single jersey
• Medium fit
• Set-in sleeves
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Wide double-needle topstitch on the sleeves and bottom hems
• Self-fabric neck tape (inside, back of the neck)
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Jaded teacher's résumé with wormy apple graphic on back. Spooky apple repeated on left chest.
FULL TEXT ON BACK:
OBJECTIVE
To inspire young minds to pretend to love learning
PROFESSIONAL ACHIEVEMENTS
Explained the same simple concept in 17 different ways (while sneaking only 3 huffs of my dry erase markers)
Counseled students through personal traumas (like “he’s wearing the same hoodie as me”)
Survived every parent/teacher conference (no helicopter, snowplow, or privileged parent left behind)
CAREER SKILLS
Psychically apprehending the “bathroom-break” fugitives
Clairvoyantly decoding every dark, subterranean meaning behind the expression “I don’t get it”
Preternaturally differentiating an AI essay from a paper written by an underdeveloped human aspiring to be a robot
AWARDS
Resting Teacher Face Hall of Fame
The Wise-apple Award for Impeccably Veiled Sarcasm
Most Likely to Host a TED Talk on “The 6000 Stages of Career Anxiety”
Made from 100% organic ring-spun cotton, this unisex t-shirt is a total must-have. It's high-quality, super comfy, and best of all—eco-friendly. US customers should order a size up.
• 100% organic ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 5.3 oz./yd.² (180 g/m²)
• Single jersey
• Medium fit
• Set-in sleeves
• 1 × 1 rib at collar
• Wide double-needle topstitch on the sleeves and bottom hems
• Self-fabric neck tape (inside, back of the neck)
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
